We put up the Christmas tree on Sunday night.
Everything was going well until THAT MOMENT when it was taking forever, the kids were getting hungry and extra needy, an ornament had been broken, the hubby’s hands were scratched from fluffing the fake pine branches, and we discovered that all the lights for the tree had burned out.
We just bought new ones last year.
Mr. B. had been working so hard on the tree. Everyone’s patience was wearing thin. No one wanted to drive to Walmart and spend money on new lights again. So he decided to dig into our outdoor light box.
As he was stringing the large outdoor lights on the tree, the perfectionist in me cringed a bit. From the looks of things, the warm glow I love about our tree was being replaced by the SUPER BRIGHT, giant, white outdoor LEDs and, to be honest, I was a little bothered by it. I practically needed a pair of sunglasses to survive the tree’s new look.
I had a decision to make. I could fuss and demand that my exhausted husband get his tush to the store and make it look MY way (thus pushing bedtimes and tree decorating even later), or I could trust that he knew what he was doing and be grateful that he was stringing the lights at all.
Lord knows if I were in charge of this part something would for sure blow up.
I chose to trust my husband. I chose to say, “It’s going to be great, hun!” instead of nag. I chose to let go of my ideals and focus on the goodness of his kind act of service.
And you know what? The tree looks great. In fact, I think my husband’s resourceful thinking truly saved the day.
How many times do we make the choice to fuss and not trust our husbands, though? How many times do we push them past their limits instead of showing them grace? How many times do we not say anything but harbor bitter resentment in our hearts when they do something that we wouldn’t have done?
This is not an easy battle. I think we tend to forget that one of Eve’s punishments was that she will “desire to control her husband,” (Genesis 3:16). And that’s it. We constantly like to think that we know better and often choose the path of fighting for our own way instead of choosing the path of humility with our spouse.
The holidays will bring plenty of opportunities for you to love your husband well or hurt him.
Beloved friends, I encourage you to love him well.
Here are a few ways we can do that this month…
- Stick to a Christmas gift budget.
- Make sure his clothes are ironed for the Christmas Eve service.
- Prepare a nice meal for him after a long day.
- Thoughtfully purchase him a present you know he will enjoy.
- Stick some of THESE CHRISTMAS LOVE NOTES in his sock drawers or under his pillow.
- Put the kids to bed early, watch a cheesy Hallmark channel Christmas movie, and drink hot chocolate.
- Send him a flirty text message like this one, “Hey baby, how about you and me make it a not so silent night.” 😉
- Don’t turn into a giant ball of stress with all of the extra holiday to-do’s. Read THIS POST if you are struggling.
- Tell him ‘Thank you’ frequently.
- Remember to cleave to your husband during the holidays. Highly value your husband when you are around extended family. See a great article on this HERE.
- If he gives you a new vacuum for Christmas, find a way to be joyful about it. Try to see the good intentions. 😉
- Make love. Under some mistletoe. (Wink!)
I guarantee that as you faithfully choose to love and serve your spouse with grace and kindness this season, your marriage will light up so brightly with the unmistakable glow of Jesus.
Y’all might even have to wear sunglasses.
– Julie 🙂
“ Live and work without pride. Be gentle and kind. Do not be hard on others. Let love keep you from doing that. Work hard to live together as one by the help of the Holy Spirit. Then there will be peace.” Ephesians 4:2-3 (NLV)
*This is a post in my series How to Have Christmas and Keep Merry! See all of the posts HERE.
**Grab the FREE Printable Holiday To-Do List by clicking HERE.
Julie, I have these Christmas Jammies. My parents gave them to me about 20 Christmases ago, and I always wear them on Christmas Eve to be festive. I have never, ever thought of them as being alluring in any way, but my husband LOVES them. A few days ago, he saw them and did a happy dance, asking me to wear them all month. I would much rather be in cozy sweatpants all month, and I laughed off his request. But yesterday, thinking about how hard he works to support us and what a wonderful husband he is, I thought, “Really, can’t I wear these for a month to make him happy?” Last night, I sent him to lie down, put the kids to bed, took out the trash, walked the dog, and then donned the Christmas jammies before having some bedtime fun. 🙂
Happy Home Fairy
Jennifer, you are AWESOME! I love this!
I heard a great idea from a grandmother last week at our Women’s Ministries Christmas meeting, put your tree up and put lights on it either while children are at school or asleep. Then have ornaments ready for them to decorate. It’s no waiting and asking “when can I put the ornaments on!!!!”
Happy Home Fairy
Mary Lou, that is a GREAT idea! Thank you!
Wow, Julie! You hit the nail on the head for me tonight!! I was sitting here flipping through my emails while stewing over a “difference of opinion” about bedtime routines with my husband and being annoyed (basically) that he doesn’t do it my way. “New post from Happy Home Fairy? Oh good – I’ve really been meaning to try her ideas with my toddler….oh….conviction….ouch.” Painful, but, oh, so necessary. Your blog is such a blessing in my life. Thank you for sharing your wonderful heart. I wished I lived by you so we could be real-life friends. 🙂
This is great. I appreciate a reminder that being kindhearted is such a blessing.
Happy Home Fairy
It is, indeed. Sometimes hardest to do with the people closest to us! But the reward is great. Many blessings on you!