I posted some of these thoughts on Instagram last night, but felt the urge to share it here, too, for any of you precious mamas who might be in a similar season!
Urgent Care >> Quickly becoming our new home away from home. Baby Zion has had a rough week of fevers, sleeplessness and all the eye gunk. The doctor diagnosed him with a double ear infection and double conjunctivitis and maybe strep throat. 🤪
The photo above shows smiles while we tried to come up with ways to entertain a baby in the doctor’s office (maybe a future blog post – ha!), but the truth is, we have had more sickness this last year than wellness, and, in full disclosure, I’m getting a little weary of it! So often I scroll social media and see people slaying life and getting stuff done, while we are just over here paying physician bills and trying to keep track of prescriptions and germs.
One would think that by now I would be so good at surrendering my will for His and joyfully receiving whatever lot He graciously gives, but the truth is my first response is always fussy and I am prone to wrestling the Lord when life gets annoying.
When we got home from the doctor, I sat down on the kitchen floor a little bit defeated while our feverish baby happily crawled around me, alternately hugging my knees and eating a banana. For all of his ailments, he is such a happy and contented baby, and I thought >> maybe I could try to live like that too. 💛
So in the spirit of 1 Thessalonians 5:18, I said thank you to God for modern medicine that I resist so much, but always seem to need. I said thank you to God for my sweet parents who took the big boys for a fun outing while we went to Urgent Care. I said thank you to God for an impromptu date with my husband while we waited for the Urgent Care to open. I said thank you to God for a husband who is there for the hard things. *I am telling you, the world might say romance is about lavish getaways and flowers and gifts, but there is no greater love than this – your man being willing to administer medicine in the middle of the night or wipe out the baby’s eye crusties or give you 10 minutes when you get home from the doctor’s office to emotionally eat alllll the chocolate.* I said thank you to God for a job full of people who are compassionate when I have to stay home another day. And I said thank you to God for being so patient with my ever-wandering, hard to submit heart.
As I rocked our little sicko to sleep that night, he looked up at me and started clapping his hands together, which is his cue to have me sing one of his favorite songs. The lyrics are as follows…
Clap your hands, all ye people! Shout unto God with a voice of triumph! Clap your hands, all ye people! Shout unto God with a voice of praise! Hosanna! Hosanna! Shout unto God with a voice of triumph! Praise Him! Praise Him! Shout unto God with a voice of praise!
As soon as I finished singing a round of the song, he would clap his hands as a cue for me to sing it again. We kept going and going with the song, and the more those words spilled out of my lips, the more the Spirit of God strengthened me with the conviction of how He wants me to live.
My flesh tends toward despair and frustration. But the Lord did not save me for a life of that. The Lord saved me for a life of victory. And so, with His help, I can clap my hands and sing for joy because of His love that even sickness cannot separate us from. If that love has removed all of my sin and saved a spot for me in heaven, then surely that love will help me bear whatever comes on my journey to that lovely place. I can give thanks for that.
Sometimes you have to just keep singing that over and over in the struggle to get to a place of that kind of belief. After all, faith is not in the seeing of miraculous healings and perfect living. Faith is when we can declare the truth in the middle of the gunk – and especially the kind that comes out the eyes. 😉
God bless you warrior mamas who are in the middle of it! You are loved!